NOTE: All heads are to scale

So, Hoover, Alabama, is the epicenter of the annual ten megaton hype explosion that is SEC Media Days. I love this event because it captures the zeitgeist perfectly:

Has anything happened?
NO!
Is something about to happen?
NOT PARTICULARLY!
Is there anything to talk about?
ARE YOU KIDDING?!
Oh... well, wanna make stretch this out over a few days and "report" from it breathlessly every five minutes?
I'VE ALREADY CAMPED OUT FOR A PRIME SABAN ARRIVAL POSITION!

You know how every episode of The Hills basically boils down to a big hunk of nothing? "Will we do something... or should we not?" Media Days is The Hills with highly paid middle-aged men, who thankfully, spend far less time in their bikinis than Audrina. Except for Rich Brooks. Anyway, thanks to 24 hour media saturation, we have an event to discuss things that have not occurred and rehash things that have been covered without pause since last season. It's a giant, expensive celebration of the Nonevent. Thank you, internet, for helping rush society toward this point.














That said, the entertainment is at times unparalleled in these dog days. http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2008/07/tennessees_phillip_fulmer_serv.html